No one will probably reply to this but I'm leaving for school on Saturday night and I'm absolutely terrified. Packing is one of the most stressful things I've ever done and I'm just really scared about what it's going to be like for the next four years.
Aw, nonnie, I think it's normal to be scared - I know I was too when I left for college. Adjusting can be hard, but remember there will be lots of other people there in the same situation as you, so try to focus on all the awesome things you're going to do in these next four years instead. :)
I know it's terrifying (I remember watching my dad leave and feeling like I was 10 years old and going to summer camp for the first time), but you'll be fine, nonnie! At the beginning, during orientation and stuff, college feels a lot like summer camp, but once classes start and you fall into a routine, it'll get less strange and confusing. My general advice:
-Go to things. Join clubs, go to events, make an effort to hang out with people in your hall, especially at the beginning. At the beginning of school, everyone is new and looking to make friends, so take advantage of that and put yourself out there. Don't isolate yourself, and force yourself to reach out to people.
-College isn't high school. I remember in high school, it was Highly Embarrassing to be seen sitting in the cafeteria by yourself. College isn't like that. It's okay to be alone sometimes, too.
-Don't get so caught up in social stuff that you don't do your school work. School is a lot of work, and in the end it needs to be top priority.
-Be careful that you don't drink too much at parties. Especially if you're female, be aware of your surroundings. There's unfortunately a lot of sexual violence that happens on college campuses, so just beware of where you leave your drink, make sure you travel with friends, etc.
I second the advice to get out and do stuff. Even if you don't like it, you can always try another club. Just don't sit in your dorm those first few days and think about how homesick you are.
Conversely, don't be afraid to take Me Time. Sometimes you might just need some time alone to yourself to process everything.
Oh, nonnie! It is sooo normal to be scared. I left for college eight years ago, and I can still remember being so terrified. Of everything. And like the airt, I was very sad at first, when my parents dropped me off. Cried my eyes out, in fact. But that'll go away, because you will meet people and there is always the telephone, a very good thing for keeping up ~home relationships. (And nowadays? With skype and shit? You are set.)
I also second all of this. Particularly the things about it not being odd to be alone, being safe at parties (and especially if you are a drinker, to make sure you've got a buddy. Who doesn't drink a ton. Somebody to watch your back.) And one thing I really second is getting out to try to meet people, and particularly people who you've got things in common with. It took me a couple months to figure that out, but once I did and connections were made, college turned out to be an amazing experience. And I know it will for you too. Goooood luck, nonnie! :D
Been there. Ended up falling into depression and moved back to my parents' house after a year. Luckily, I quickly got into another university, this one better suited to my tastes. But maybe I would have been able to enjoy the other one better if I hadn't been in such a funk. I recommend not isolating yourself. Meet people, even if it's not college people. Find out what happens in the town you're going to live, and get a hobby there or something. Basically something to keep you connected to the world outside.
I'm so jealous- I loved college. It's a little intimidating at first, but it can be an awesome experience.
Second all the advice about getting involved. I had a pretty small social circle in high school, but I really branched out in college. It's remarkably easy, as long as you're willing to be a little uncomfortable at first (if you're not accustomed to, or overly fond of socializing, that is).
Also, go to class. I know that sounds obvious- class is what you're there for- but it's incredibly easy to skip. Oh, and talk in class, too. Go to office hours, even for your bigger classes. Professors love that. If you're going close to home, force yourself to stay on weekends. The people I knew who went home often were the ones who had the hardest time adjusting.
Most of all, have fun! Party (responsibly) if you like to, learn a new language, take karate, find a Supernatural fan club. Whatever you like, whatever you enjoy, chances are you'll be able to find other people who like it, too.
It's normal to be scared, nonnie! this is a big adjustment. What I would recommend goes along with what the other nonnies have said. Make sure you go out and meet people! Even if the people you meet at first don't end up being your bestest best friends, it can just be really great to have a moderately large group of people that you can hang out with occasionally, that will invite you to parties, tell you about things happening, join you for lunch, etc. So get out there and join clubs! College is an amazing experience to have a "fresh start" from high school, so no matter what kind of social role you occupied in high school, you can try something else now.
Also, I would recommend really try to find out the resources on your campus. The health services, the counselling services, the sexual assault centre, the women's centre, whatever it is that your campus has to offer. In that case if the adjustment is hard, or if something comes up, you'll already know what resources there are around to offer you support, and don't hesitate to take advantage. These services are there for YOU.
One thing I'd tell myself if I could travel back in time would be this:
Keep every scrap of paper that's even vaguely official. (Even if you think you could throw it away.) Keep all of that in one place - a folder or a shoebox if you want but keep it all in one place and keep *all* of it. Someone will want to see it sooner or later.
Fill out forms on time, possibly with four weeks to spare in case you need to hunt down a birth certificate or something like that.
Ask other students which profs are nice and which aren't and pick your courses accordingly (if you can).
Again, really, if there's something official and it has a deadline, take care of it ASAP.
Above all, you're a person; you're human. But so is everyone else. The other students will be as nervous as you - some less, some more. Your profs are people, too, and - a few assholes excepted - they're not out to get you. (Really, college is more or less like school. It's not an entirely different world.)
Keep every scrap of paper that's even vaguely official. (Even if you think you could throw it away.) Keep all of that in one place - a folder or a shoebox if you want but keep it all in one place and keep *all* of it. Someone will want to see it sooner or later.
And your notes from previous classes! No one told me to do this, and I was a bit surprised when I had some of the same professors as earlier classes and they expected me to be able to look back at previous years' notes.
I was right there where you are last year. In fact, tomorrow, I'm going back to college too.
Well, I guess all I can do is repeat stuff, but I'll try to add something new.
- "Keep everything official". Oh yes, that's really important. Also, keep bills for important things, like your books, or household stuff. You might be able to take it off your tax. (Or rather, your parents might.)
- In a similar vein, organise your money well. I didn't have a job and got pocket-money from my parents that covered the absolute basic stuff. They usually send a larger amount at once because of the conversion rates. Well, of course, I was completely in awe that I had such large sums of money and bought a lot of stuff, thinking I could compensate by buying the cheapest food, etc. It didn't work that way and I pretty much used up all of my savings. My plan for this year is to get some cash every monday which should last for the rest of the week, so that at the end of the month, I haven't used up everything.
- Go to your classes, or if you don't, at least actually study hard. I did neither, and BARELY passed all my classes. I know I'll skip many classes this year too, but I'll really try not too.
- Write notes.
- Make a cleaning plan with your flatmates, if you have any. I had a really bad experience in this regard. My flatmates were nice enough, but we were a bit messy. But most of all, some of them just didn't clean up the kitchen after cooking. I stopped cooking there entirely, only using the oven occasionally and the microwave because I was so grossed out. Everything was sticky, dirty and just disgusting.
- Talk to people. I've been miserable, because I didn't make a single friend. Really, not a single one. I'll try to change that next year. I think it's best to do it in the beginning, when people haven't already found other people to hang out with. Just remember, most people are probably intimidated, so they'll probably be just as happy about someone talking to them as you would be.
- Take your time. Not too much, obviously, but don't stress yourself out. Take care of yourself. If you're overwhelmed, take a day off and relax.
- Regularly check your college e-mail account.
- I guess you've already left, so telling you what to pack is kind of unnecessary, but well, the important thing is, don't worry too much about having forgotten something.
- Keep a healthy sleep pattern. Not necessarily 9pm - 7 am, but try not to stay up too late. That way, you'll also avoid skipping class because you're too tired to go or hear the alarm.
Thank you everyone for the advice. The first week is over and I'm pretty settled in and it almost feels like home right now. I guess I was freaking out over nothing and thank you for making me feel so much better.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 12:10 am (UTC)(link)Older and wiser nonnies have advice?
Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 12:23 am (UTC)(link)Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 12:24 am (UTC)(link)-Go to things. Join clubs, go to events, make an effort to hang out with people in your hall, especially at the beginning. At the beginning of school, everyone is new and looking to make friends, so take advantage of that and put yourself out there. Don't isolate yourself, and force yourself to reach out to people.
-College isn't high school. I remember in high school, it was Highly Embarrassing to be seen sitting in the cafeteria by yourself. College isn't like that. It's okay to be alone sometimes, too.
-Don't get so caught up in social stuff that you don't do your school work. School is a lot of work, and in the end it needs to be top priority.
-Be careful that you don't drink too much at parties. Especially if you're female, be aware of your surroundings. There's unfortunately a lot of sexual violence that happens on college campuses, so just beware of where you leave your drink, make sure you travel with friends, etc.
Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 12:28 am (UTC)(link)I second the advice to get out and do stuff. Even if you don't like it, you can always try another club. Just don't sit in your dorm those first few days and think about how homesick you are.
Conversely, don't be afraid to take Me Time. Sometimes you might just need some time alone to yourself to process everything.
You'll be fine, nonnie. Don't forget us <3333
Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 02:24 am (UTC)(link)Oh, nonnie! It is sooo normal to be scared. I left for college eight years ago, and I can still remember being so terrified. Of everything. And like the airt, I was very sad at first, when my parents dropped me off. Cried my eyes out, in fact. But that'll go away, because you will meet people and there is always the telephone, a very good thing for keeping up ~home relationships. (And nowadays? With skype and shit? You are set.)
I also second all of this. Particularly the things about it not being odd to be alone, being safe at parties (and especially if you are a drinker, to make sure you've got a buddy. Who doesn't drink a ton. Somebody to watch your back.) And one thing I really second is getting out to try to meet people, and particularly people who you've got things in common with. It took me a couple months to figure that out, but once I did and connections were made, college turned out to be an amazing experience. And I know it will for you too. Goooood luck, nonnie! :D
Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 01:43 am (UTC)(link)Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 02:25 am (UTC)(link)Second all the advice about getting involved. I had a pretty small social circle in high school, but I really branched out in college. It's remarkably easy, as long as you're willing to be a little uncomfortable at first (if you're not accustomed to, or overly fond of socializing, that is).
Also, go to class. I know that sounds obvious- class is what you're there for- but it's incredibly easy to skip. Oh, and talk in class, too. Go to office hours, even for your bigger classes. Professors love that. If you're going close to home, force yourself to stay on weekends. The people I knew who went home often were the ones who had the hardest time adjusting.
Most of all, have fun! Party (responsibly) if you like to, learn a new language, take karate, find a Supernatural fan club. Whatever you like, whatever you enjoy, chances are you'll be able to find other people who like it, too.
Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 05:46 pm (UTC)(link)What I would recommend goes along with what the other nonnies have said. Make sure you go out and meet people! Even if the people you meet at first don't end up being your bestest best friends, it can just be really great to have a moderately large group of people that you can hang out with occasionally, that will invite you to parties, tell you about things happening, join you for lunch, etc. So get out there and join clubs! College is an amazing experience to have a "fresh start" from high school, so no matter what kind of social role you occupied in high school, you can try something else now.
Also, I would recommend really try to find out the resources on your campus. The health services, the counselling services, the sexual assault centre, the women's centre, whatever it is that your campus has to offer. In that case if the adjustment is hard, or if something comes up, you'll already know what resources there are around to offer you support, and don't hesitate to take advantage. These services are there for YOU.
I hope you have a lot of fun!
Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 07:32 pm (UTC)(link)Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 10:10 pm (UTC)(link)One thing I'd tell myself if I could travel back in time would be this:
Keep every scrap of paper that's even vaguely official. (Even if you think you could throw it away.) Keep all of that in one place - a folder or a shoebox if you want but keep it all in one place and keep *all* of it. Someone will want to see it sooner or later.
Fill out forms on time, possibly with four weeks to spare in case you need to hunt down a birth certificate or something like that.
Ask other students which profs are nice and which aren't and pick your courses accordingly (if you can).
Again, really, if there's something official and it has a deadline, take care of it ASAP.
Above all, you're a person; you're human. But so is everyone else. The other students will be as nervous as you - some less, some more. Your profs are people, too, and - a few assholes excepted - they're not out to get you. (Really, college is more or less like school. It's not an entirely different world.)
Anyway, I wish you the best of luck, nonnie. <3
Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-16 10:38 pm (UTC)(link)And your notes from previous classes! No one told me to do this, and I was a bit surprised when I had some of the same professors as earlier classes and they expected me to be able to look back at previous years' notes.
Re: Leaving for College
(Anonymous) 2011-09-17 10:33 pm (UTC)(link)Well, I guess all I can do is repeat stuff, but I'll try to add something new.
- "Keep everything official". Oh yes, that's really important. Also, keep bills for important things, like your books, or household stuff. You might be able to take it off your tax. (Or rather, your parents might.)
- In a similar vein, organise your money well. I didn't have a job and got pocket-money from my parents that covered the absolute basic stuff. They usually send a larger amount at once because of the conversion rates. Well, of course, I was completely in awe that I had such large sums of money and bought a lot of stuff, thinking I could compensate by buying the cheapest food, etc. It didn't work that way and I pretty much used up all of my savings. My plan for this year is to get some cash every monday which should last for the rest of the week, so that at the end of the month, I haven't used up everything.
- Go to your classes, or if you don't, at least actually study hard. I did neither, and BARELY passed all my classes. I know I'll skip many classes this year too, but I'll really try not too.
- Write notes.
- Make a cleaning plan with your flatmates, if you have any. I had a really bad experience in this regard. My flatmates were nice enough, but we were a bit messy. But most of all, some of them just didn't clean up the kitchen after cooking. I stopped cooking there entirely, only using the oven occasionally and the microwave because I was so grossed out. Everything was sticky, dirty and just disgusting.
- Talk to people. I've been miserable, because I didn't make a single friend. Really, not a single one. I'll try to change that next year. I think it's best to do it in the beginning, when people haven't already found other people to hang out with. Just remember, most people are probably intimidated, so they'll probably be just as happy about someone talking to them as you would be.
- Take your time. Not too much, obviously, but don't stress yourself out. Take care of yourself. If you're overwhelmed, take a day off and relax.
- Regularly check your college e-mail account.
- I guess you've already left, so telling you what to pack is kind of unnecessary, but well, the important thing is, don't worry too much about having forgotten something.
- Keep a healthy sleep pattern. Not necessarily 9pm - 7 am, but try not to stay up too late. That way, you'll also avoid skipping class because you're too tired to go or hear the alarm.
Good luck!
THANK YOU
(Anonymous) 2011-09-27 04:37 am (UTC)(link)I'm bookmarking this for the advice!
Re: THANK YOU
(Anonymous) 2011-09-27 04:52 am (UTC)(link)